Crunch Time

Boosting mood in a tough economy

Many people in our country are currently in survival mode. Even those who had high paying jobs find themselves either unemployed or underemployed.  Finances are tight. The general mood among the populace is pretty low.

Boosting mood in this tough economy seems like a daunting task. Washington is doing what it can, putting various spins on the reality and highlighting any gains we are experiencing. It looks like we are working our way out of the financial woods - but it will take awhile before we are out completely.

I am reading a very interesting book entitled, "Deep Survival: Who lives, Who dies, And why". In it the author, Laurence Gonzales, tries to determine the reason that some people are more hearty than others in surviving disasters. He discovered that one of the deeper emotions survivors mine is humor.  It a release of tension and fears that dangerous situations produce.

The author discovered that laughter makes the feeling of being threatened manageable. It's about being cool. It's about laughing with an attitude of bold humility in the face of something terrifying. The best humorists and comedians make us laugh at life because it is a deep way we can make sense and poke fun of the burdens of life.  Survival humor is not the surface "ha ha's", but a deeper understanding of how the brain works in discovering and facing the reality of the situation.

In this tough economy, when was the last time you laughed?

Gaze into the mirror

Here is a quote from one of my favorite theologians and a significant influence in my life, Dr. James F. Miller. He integrates looking at ourselves up close as well as from far.  The perspective can be surprising and wonderful.

"What you see does not have to be what you get, nor all you give to others. Hidden away is more than you can see, more than you can imagine. We live in a culture of the apparent. How we need the perspective of depth and mystery, surprise and promise. We need the triumph of compassion which sees each human being, no matter how marred and scarred on the outside, as a beautiful wonder with treasure hidden inside. It starts with looking and then seeing what is in the mirror." read more here>

It's On

Southwest Airlines launched a new Ad Campaign on June 1st aimed at tough times. At the end of the ad a narrator intones that the airline doesn't fly around tough times. It's on, and they're ready.

It's on for all us... 

It's on every time our minds persist in discouraging thoughts.

It's on every time we think we can go it alone without the comaraderie of those who care.

It's on every time we stubbornly refuse to admit our fear and hide behind a facade of platitudes.

It's on every time we avoid nourishing our souls with silent listening, contemplation, and transcedent faith.

It's on every time our decisions preclude others who are in greater need.

It's on every time we become too enamored with our technology to solve our problems.

It's on every time we rely on massive military might to secure our happiness.

It's on every time we stop taking initiative for the health of our relationships.

It's on every time we live without grace.

This is the time of our lives. It's tough. It's on. Are you ready?

Magic happens

Today I had the honor of witnessing the Teacher of the Year ceremony at Denver Academy. It was particularly poignant since the award is now named in honor of a long time Denver Academy teacher and one of my all-time best friends, Kevin Gregier. He passed away last November (2008) from cancer at the age of 64.  I miss him every day.

The afternoon summed up so well the wonder of Kevin Gregier as a teacher and the magic of Denver Academy as a place for learning.  Wonder and magic together provide enchanting elixirs to enliven our educational quandaries:

•Learning that is centered more on the varied needs of the student than in the confines of a curriculum.

•Teaching that is liberated so educators can bring their own whimsy to their subject matter.

•A commaraderie that goes beyond selfishness, looks to the betterment of everyone, and exhibits a genuine joy to be in the company of each other.

•An awareness of a spiritual transcendence that resides not only in the hearts and minds of students but is embedded in the very nature of education itself.

•Leadership that realizes life is messy and in a constant state of flux. They are not afraid to take a risk for the sake of the contemporary student or for the enhancement of a teacher's well-being.

•An extended community of parents who take an active role in sparking the perpetual potential of every child they come in contact with.

Thank you Denver Academy and all the places like you who provide an educational environment where wonder is taught and magic happens everyday.

Cognitive Distortions

I focus on four competencies to help people effectively navigate life's accelerating changes:

• Vibrant Imagination
• Robust Collaboration
• Potent Communication
• Persistent Adaptation

In this post I want to focus on Persistent Adaptation and the awareness of cognitive distortions. These are inaccurate thoughts or ideas which maintain negative thinking and help to maintain negative emotions. I'll admit that I default into one or more of these distortions more often than I'd like.

Eliminating these distortions and negative thought can improve mood and discourage maladies such as depression and chronic anxiety. Being aware of these distortions is a powerful first step to persistently adapt to discontinuous change and its discontents. Take a look and see if any of them are getting in your way.

1. All-or-nothing thinking: You see things in black and white categories. If your performance falls short of perfect, you see yourself as a total failure.

2. Overgeneralization: You see a single negative event as a never-ending pattern of defeat.

3. Mental filter: You pick out a single negative detail and dwell on it exclusively so that your vision of all reality becomes darkened, like the drop of ink that discolors the entire beaker of water.

4. Disqualifying the positive: You reject positive experiences by insisting they "don't count" for some reason or other. You maintain a negative belief that is contradicted by your everyday experiences.

5. Jumping to conclusions: You make a negative interpretation even though there are no definite facts that convincingly support your conclusion.

• Mind reading: You arbitrarily conclude that someone is reacting negatively to you and don't bother to check it out.

• The Fortune Teller Error: You anticipate that things will turn out badly and feel convinced that your prediction is an already-established fact.

6. Magnification (catastrophizing) or minimization: You exaggerate the importance of things (such as your goof-up or someone else's achievement), or you inappropriately shrink things until they appear tiny (your own desirable qualities or the other fellow's imperfections). This is also called the "binocular trick."

7. Emotional reasoning: You assume that your negative emotions necessarily reflect the way things really are: "I feel it, therefore it must be true."

8. Should statements: You try to motivate yourself with shoulds and shouldn'ts, as if you had to be whipped and punished before you could be expected to do anything. "Musts" and "oughts" are also offenders. The emotional consequence is guilt. When you direct should statements toward others, you feel anger, frustration, and resentment.

9. Labeling and mislabeling: This is an extreme form of overgeneralization. Instead of describing your error, you attach a negative label to yourself: "I'm a loser." When someone else's behavior rubs you the wrong way, you attach a negative label to him, "He's a damn louse." Mislabeling involves describing an event with language that is highly colored and emotionally loaded.

10. Personalization: You see yourself as the cause of some negative external event for which, in fact, you were not primarily responsible.

From: Burns, David D., MD. 1989. The Feeling Good Handbook. New York: William Morrow and Company, Inc.